Stormy

ROFL sad but true, nonetheless.

Sorry to hear about Uncle Bill, but what an honor to have his ashes spread that way. That link, BTW, is quite informative, though it could do with a bit of judicious proofreading.

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied: 'I cannot accept money from you; I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door. Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied: 'I cannot accept money from you; I'm doing community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you ' card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door. Then a Congressman came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied: 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Congressman was very happy and left the shop. The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Congressmen lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it. BOTH POLITICIANS AND DIAPERS NEED TO BE CHANGED OFTEN AND FOR THE SAME REASON!

Good to have you joining us RAiN, I'm hoping to see much more of you in the future. Welcome to our world

Thanks Steve, I'm sorry I didn't tell you before.

Leave no bird behind!!

"She's a light at the nightsky now watching over u" That's good, thank you, Casa, very much how I envision her.

Thanks Nan, and you're right on all counts.

Thank you Leslie, Thank you Odd, thank you Branson, thank you Smiley and thank you Dawn and thank you Koach. She was a lot of fun, I remember when she used to host those ASCII art shows in #KoachsArtShop on MSN, those were a lot of fun and brought us a lot of chatters. LOL about the wedding Koach, we had four or five people from the chatroom that actually traveled to Texas for the wedding and we still have that ASCII wedding album that Luv and Crysta made for us. No problem Dawn, it will be some time before I'm ready to talk about it, I'm still trying to get my head around the fact that she's no longer sitting at the desk next to mine telling me what I need to do.

I'm not sure where to start here, maybe just jump right in. To make a long story short, I awoke Tuesday evening, got dressed, made us both a cup of coffee and went to wake Blondie up. She didn't respond, and never will, she had passed away in her sleep. I'm not looking for sympathy, just passing on news to those who knew her best. I'm still not sure this happened, I'll know why when the autopsy is finished and the cause is given to me. All I know at this point is she looked more peaceful and relaxed than she has in quite some time, she had many health issues that she didn't want everyone to know, she was uncomfortable with attention like that, but Congestive heart disease, a Cerebral Aneurism, Restless Leg Syndrome, Fibromyalgia and hypertension as well as some others and pretty much refused to follow any suggestions that curtailed her ability to "live as she chose". I allowed her to do this and I had a lot of guilt right now for not being more stringent in trying to get her to do as she was told. But after thinking about it, that's how she wanted it and who knows, maybe she was right. That's pretty much all I want to say at this time, other than thank you all for being her friend and mine for all these years, it means a lot to me. So Thank you. I also am uncomfortable with a lot of attention, so if you feel you need to say something to me or about her, please do it here, not on the server and in the rooms, it will be much easier for me to thank the ones that do. Again, thank you all. So, if you don't see me around much in the next week or so, it's nothing personal towards anyone, I just need some time to get my head right (As we used to say).

Thank you Dawn, that's a huge help. I'm accustomed to being the one with all the answers and have not quite assimilated the idea that I'm no longer capable of the energy and time required to learn everything on my own. I love the program and now have it so screwed up I might have to delete and begin over LOL. I looked at it about 9 last night and it showed night was over Europe and it sure looked dark outside here to me.

I'm just awestruck, I have it but haven't figured out how to set the flags yet, I've been rather busy lately.

While conducting some business at the Court House, I overheard a lady, who had been arrested for assaulting a Mammogram Technician, say, “Your Honor, I’m guilty, but….there were extenuating circumstances.” The female Judge said, sarcastically, “I’d certainly like to hear those extenuating circumstances.” I did too, so I listened as the lady told her story. “Your Honor, I had a mammogram appointment, which I actually kept. I was met by this perky little clipboard carrier smiling from ear to ear and she tilted her head to one side and crooned, “Hi! I’m Belinda! All I need you to do is step into this room right here, strip to the waist, then slip on this gown. Everything clear?” I’m thinking, “Belinda, try decaf. This ain’t rocket science.” Belinda then skipped away to prepare the chamber of horrors. With the right side finished, Belinda flipped me (literally) to the left and said, “Hmmmm. Can you stand on your tippy toes and lean in a tad so we can get everything?” Fine, I answered. I was freezing, bruised, and out of air, so why not use the remaining circulation in my legs and neck to finish me off? My body was in a holding pattern that defied gravity (with my other breast wedged between those two 4-inch pieces of square glass) when I heard and felt a zap! Complete darkness, the power was off! Belinda said, “Uh-oh, maintenance is working, bet they hit a snag.” Then she headed for the door. “Excuse me! You’re not leaving me in this vise alone are you?” I shouted. Belinda kept going and said, “Oh, you fussy puppy…the door’s wide open so you’ll have the emergency hall lights. I’ll be right back.” Before I could shout NOOOO! she disappeared. And that’s exactly how Bubba and Earl, “maintenance men Extraordinaire” found me…half-naked with part of me dangling from the Jaws of Life and the other part smashed between glass! After exchanging a polite, ‘Hi, how’s it going’ type greeting, Bubba (or possibly Earl) asked, to my utter disbelief, if I knew the power was off. Trying to disguise my hysteria, I replied with as much calmness as possible, “Uh, yes, I did but thanks anyway.” “OK, you take care now,” Bubba replied and waved good-bye as though I’d been standing in the line at the grocery store. Two hours later, Belinda breezes in wearing a sheepish grin. Making no attempt to suppress her amusement, she said, “Oh, I am sooo sorry! The power came back on and I totally forgot about you! And silly me, I went to lunch. Are we upset?” And that, Your Honor, is exactly how her head ended up between the clamps….” The judge could hardly contain her laughter as she said, “Case Dismissed!”

/me gives Nan some words to use

A husband and wife who work for the circus go to an adoption agency. Social workers there raise doubts about their suitability. The couple produces photos of their 50-foot motor home, which is clean and well maintained and equipped with a beautiful nursery. The social workers raise concerns about the education a child would receive while in the couple's care. "We've arranged for a full-time tutor who will teach the child all the usual subjects along with French, Mandarin, and computer skills." Then the social workers express concern about a child being raised in a circus environment. "Our nanny is a certified expert in pediatric care, welfare, and diet." The social workers are finally satisfied. Then they ask, "What age child are you hoping to adopt?" "It doesn't really matter, as long as the kid fits in the cannon."

LOL

Top and Middle ones

I'm sorry to hear about your Mom's issues and can understand not being overly sociable at this time. Hopefully tests will show no major problem and life will return to normal soon. Take care.

The nice thing about that pacifier is that it can also be used as a toothpick

Sorry to hear that Dawn. Best wishes to Mom.

HAW HAW HAW

Good luck ganjax

Happy UnBirthday, Dawn

Don't forget haunted churches and mansions.