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Last trip to COSTCO


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Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO

buying a large bag of Purina

 

 

 

dog chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the

 

check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

 

What did she think I had, an elephant?

So since I'm retired and

 

have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I

 

was starting the Purina Diet again.

I added that I probably shouldn't,

because I ended up in

the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened

 

in an intensive care ward with tubes

coming out of most of my

 

orifices and IVs in both arms.

 

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that

 

it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply

 

eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it

works well and I was going to try it again.

(I have to mention here

 

that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

 

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her "No, I stepped

off a curb to sniff a

 

poodle's hind quarters and a car hit me."

 

I thought the guy behind her was going

to have a heart attack

he was laughing so hard.

 

Costco won't let me shop there anymore.

Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in

 

the world to think of crazy things to say.

 

 

Forward this (especially)

 

to all your retired friends...it will be their laugh for the day!!!

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